As a kid, I was fascinated with world records. I had a Guiness book and read it ragged. I really wanted to have my own record so I started looking at some possibilities. Swallowing 30 swords at once, nope. Pulling a train with my teeth, no way. Sitting in a tree for 3 days. Maybe! I made all these plans and such but then forgot about it for a couple of years. I regained interest and checked the current record to make sure it was the same. nope, FIFTY SIX DAYS. So much for that brilliant plan. Most world records are so extreme that there is virtually zero chance of any normal human ever breaking one.
For example: Eating chicken - 27 two pound "pullets" at one sitting.
Who can eat 27 chickens?
Fastest working a Rubik's cube: THIRTEEN SECONDS. Yes, I saw the guy do it on TV. But worse, a guy worked it with his feet in about 30 seconds.
Cheese: 2 pounds in a minute or two (can't remember exactly). Sounds easy? HAH! you try it. after a half pound you won't be able to get another bite down.
Raw oysters: about 450. I saw the attempt on tv. A very large (fat) man was on a boat where the oysters were and they had a table full ready for his attempt. He went to wailing on them and somewhere around 450, he turned around and hurled. Can you imagine the mess on the floor after someone hurls 450 raw oysters? I'm glad i was not a deckhand on that boat.
A great bar bet is to bet someone that they can't eat more than 5 saltine crackers in a minute or less. They will guffaw and laugh at you while they slap that 20 on the counter. The first and second go down fast. But the third starts really getting thick because there is zero spit left in your mouth. The fourth becomes a goo ball that cannot be swallowed. Most people never get to the fifth. Grab that 20, order a beer for the loser and 5 for yourself.
They had a jalapeno eating contest in my hometown a long time ago, and although it did not break any world records, it was still fun to watch. the winner was a guy they called "the rabbit" because he nibbled his down in little bites. He ate over a hundred in a row. the other contestants all headed for the bathroom at some point and never made it back to knock the rabbit down.
Check this out cuz, there is a guy that ate A WHOLE CAR. No, not in one piece, you dumbass, he had it ground up into fine powder. Windows, seats, engine, shocks, rubber hoses, butts in the ashtray, the whole shootin' match. He put a few spoonfuls in his meals every day until it was all gone. They say he started out eating a bicycle before the car as practice.
Hamburgers: 77 at one sitting.
Smallest waist: 12 inches. No Kidding. Even these pathetic size 0 girls straggling around nowdays can't match that.
Fattest person. Over a thousand pounds. They buried him in a piano case. No kidding.
Deep Knee Bends in a Hot Air Balloon: What a stupid record. But anyway, I know the pilot that took him up. I am a balloon pilot and went to an event at this guys place one time. Anyway, Brian took up the guy and a witness/counter and the guy did over three thousand (3,000) deep knee bends.
Tallest person: Robert Wadlow at 8'10". The sad part about this is that Robert died in his 20s because a doctor incorrectly fitted a leg brace and it caused some sort of infection that killed him. If I could get my hands on that doctor I'd wrap him in barbed wire and throw him out in the desert to bake. And maybe tie him to an ant bed. One of those huge antbeds like 6 feet tall. Or better yet, handcuff him to a chair with a very large vase (like 4 feet tall) in front of him. Then drop the handcuff key down the vase and wander out. After a few minutes he will inch his chair forward and start trying to kick the vase over to get the key. Well, when that vase falls over cracks open, A THOUSAND SCORPIONS WILL COME OUT. They'll all climb up on him and one two three, out!
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